Step 1

For step one, I will read The Doctor's Opinion, and I have been asked to list 20 incidents, results of drinking, that show how unmanageable it got. (Is that the same for everyone, do different sponsors/sponsees do things differently? Who knows, here goes...)

1. Alcohol = the months at a time of isolation, hopelessness, and depression - not speaking to anyone, holed away in my room.
2. Alcohol = poor health, terrible physical well begin: poor diet, diarrhea, random aches and pains.
3. Alcohol = waking up every morning with brutal hangover, both mind and body, which only recommencing with drinking again will cure.
4. Alcohol = anxiety and stress (especially during 1.) for my family and loved ones.
5. Alcohol = drink driving / damage to car.
   
6. Alcohol = criminal damage, being arrested (and -> 4. -> 1...)
7. Alcohol = no degree / no career (no maintaining anything!)
8. Alcohol = lost property: lost mobile phones, money, untold valuables.
9. Alcohol = waking up with people I shouldnt have (e.g. K when going out with N).
10. Alcohol = losing many people I care about, through my poor behaviour and choices (e.g. L/ N/ C/ M...)
11. Alcohol = disastrous interview for M&S.
12. Alcohol = 1/3 of my life 'wasted'.
13. Alcohol = lying & deceit (e.g. 'Laura'/'Emma' to G).
14. Alcohol = over sleeping. (When plastering, BT, Pub...)
15. Alcohol = no control of my spending/CC use - just booze booze booze, money or not.
16. Alcohol = losing job, cheques bouncing, arguments with C, fleeing to Wales.
17. Alcohol = fleeing from Wales - as opposed to 'place to get head together'!
18. Alcohol = being abusive and snide and nasty, e.g. M in Kingston.
19. Alcohol = embarrassing and inappropriate flirting (with C @ Illusions, K.C. end of year, C.T.)
20. Alcohol = stealing drinks when staying round peoples' houses. (L's, M's, N's, Mum & Dads...)

So there are some of my cringe inducing moments, although somehow at the time I could have explained them, or rather though it somehow normal. Or at least a few more drinks and I would have forgotten in no time.